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Mittwoch, 20. Februar 2013
School was pretty good today - I almost fell asleep again after my alarm went off, but managed to get out of bed, make myself some porridge and trudge to school, after exchanging a couple of e-mails with a few friends from back home.
In school I almost continued right where I'd let off - we had a spare and I did my Math stuff in almost-record time (30 minutes) and then ... well, chatted on facebook.
Spanish wasn't too bad, either - we did some dumb vocab games, but nothing too bad.
During lunch I saw the dance teacher whom I had talked to during my panic attack in Math some two weeks or so ago, and she wrote an e-mail to our librarians to check for a book she'd recommended me.
Math ... was ... kinda difficult.
I hate that graphing stuff, and I have arrived at a point where I am so tired that I keep messing up the easiest things!
At least I know where my problem lies, so I will probably talk to Mr Murphy about it tomorrow and get him to explain to me what effect exactly the different transformations have on a square-root function.
I have gotten myself exactly into the kind of trouble I was always scared of: I lost the train in class. Not badly, but I am really confused...
It should be clarifiable (that's not a word, I know, but do you understand what I mean?) easily...
Creative Writing was, as always, the absolute best.
We finally finished our headline poems - and you can definitely see why I didn't become a poet - but didn't write a Journal entry... sadly.
I had an idea yesterday, stemming from a conversation I'd had with a girl from my Math class where she'd pointed out that my grammar is probably better than most native speakers'. And I wondered why.
I ran my idea by my hostfather, but I though Mr Derksen might have an opinion, too, and also he might have the knowledge to agree or disagree with me - but when I explained to him, what I had in mind, he looked at me kinda dubiously and said things like "well, double spaced ten pages should be alright".
And I'm just like "WTF?! 10 Pages?! I don't want to clog my journal up like that!"
The thing was: we were talking about two completely different things.
I was talking about a normal journal entry, while he was thinking I was talking about the big project!
So, well, I started jotting things down for a compilation of my analytical feelings texts, and I think I might do that. A collection of me-centered pieces focused on my exchange year would probably be an easy thing to do.
I'd start with a timeline, laying out the bare framework and explaining what happened when, and then picking out things and elaborating on them.
It's gonna be a big project, but it's gotta be 20 to 30 pages, so that should work out just fine.
And if I realize it doesn't, I should be able to switch to my fantasy world.
After school,waiting for Andy to pick me up, I hung around Mr Derksen's room and talked to him about ... languages? I think that was it ... It's just so great to have somebody who listens attentively and gives you his thoughts - and also things he's seen in you - that I can hardly describe it.
For example, he warned us in class not to fall in love with our own words.
And I know that I can't write a short piece, I always make it so long, so I asked him whether I fall in love with my own words. He looked at me, shook his head and explained "No, it's different with you. You don't fall in love with your words, you love the sound of language and you get lost in the process. You fall in love with the thoughts, not the words."
Do you know what I mean?
I'm just so fascinated by the language and its intricacies and the way you can express things ... I don't think in pictures.
I know a lot of people say when they read, they have this movie running in their head.
There is only a voice that reads everything I read out loud in my head (I wrote a piece on that in my journal), but if I want to have an image of what I'm reading, I actually have to sit down and concentrate really hard.
I have a bad visual imagination, on which I blame my inability to draw. I need a visual representation, which is probably one of the reasons I love fanfiction so much - you have the actors, so you don't have to make up your own images. If I have to do it, the faces are usually pretty blank, or based on somebody I know.
When I write, I don't - or rarely - write out what I see in front of my 'inner eye'. I write what I like to hear out loud, phrases that combine into a nice sound, but there are no pictures.
I write for the sake of getting my thoughts in order, for the sake of actually thinking, because I tend to get distracted in my own head, and for the sake of the melody the words form. I can't express it, I'm sorry. It's not really a melody, it's more of a flow, something so abstract that I can't put it into words.
And since I read for the sake of hearing the words, typos and grammar mistakes are killing me. Seriously, there is little more annoying to my mind.
(Okay, one thing might be noise. I am so tired and stressed out, that the slightest sound is making me want to crawl out of my own skin, especially bad is chewing, or people sniffing up their noses... I might have mentioned that yesterday?)
After school, Andy picked me up and we went to one of the dance studios around town, because I want to get back into the swing, but unfortunately it was closed...
I'll have to call it at one point.
The evening I spent hanging out in the kitchen and showing Tanya a couple of recipes I have found online that look delicious, telling Tanya about the Harlem Shake - do you know it? It's so funny, and even more awesome to experience such a meme live! - and thinking about my project for Creative Writing - instead of doing my homework.
So I'm kinda lagging behind in Math right now (although algebraically solving equations really isn't that hard) and we have a Math test on Thursday, as well as a vocab test in Spanish.
On Friday, a professor of poetry from the UBCO (University of British Columbia Okanagan) will come by our CW class, which I'm really looking forward to.
I wanted to watch the Blackhawks game, but it was on TV, so I spent the first two periods listening and the third watching upstairs with Andy.
The Hawks won again!
In a shootout, but a win nonetheless, which means they have now tied the league record for most games with at least one point (as soon as it goes to overtime, each team automatically gets a point and they're battling only for the second one) and have now one point in a third of all their games this season!
Yes, a third of the season is already over (16 games), and the Hawks are 13-0-3 (Wins - Losses - Overtime/Shootout losses, in the Hawks' case three shootout losses)... And I am so jealous - everybody over 18 in Illinois, Indiana and Wisconsin can take part in a lottery to win a road trip with the Hawks!
Aaaanyway, I'm headed to bed now - as I mentioned, I am really tired...
I might play another round of Temple Run - they released a new version and it's so awesome - but other than that I'm beat!